Suckered

Gratitude 3/21/2026

I am grateful for the gift of a new day.
My heart is filled with gratitude for the many blessings I have.
I will appreciate the small joys and express my thanks in all circumstances.
Let my attitude of gratitude bring joy to others.

I’m actually grateful for the different times in my life I have fallen prey to making some bad choices.

It’s the first day of spring and we’re thinking about spring cleaning and home repairs. Yesterday we had a guy come out to look at our old old windows and give us an estimate for re-putty, fixing broken glass, and repairing rotted frames. This experience brought me right back to times I’ve fallen for smooth talkers and wanted to believe when all the evidence told me not to.

One of my first bad experiences was joining the Columbia Record Club when I was about 15 and was making my own money babysitting. The deal was that you paid for one album and got 12 for “free” along with signing up to buy one record a month. Somehow, I got a lot of records I didn’t really want and the bills kept coming. It was a hard lesson learned but it didn’t stop me from signing up for Cheese of the Month and others signing up for book or audio tape of the month. Maybe if I was more disciplined, I could have kept up with those, but somehow the monthly package is always a little disappointing and you keep shelling out money.

Another bad experience I had was buying a VW convertible bug. That was back in the 70s when we had first moved to Ohio. I needed a car! My 64 Rambler American was giving me constant trouble. I had parked next to a freshly painted red 60s something convertible bug. It looked so cool! And it had a for sale sign on it. The owner came out and we got to talking. He had put a shag fabric on the floors and I fell in love!

I think I took it to a mechanic and he gave the engine the okey dokey, especially because he could see how much it appealed to me. I borrowed some money from my dad and I was thrilled.

It didn’t take long to start having problems. Somehow the carpet on the floor got really wet every time it rained. And there was NO heat. That wasn’t a problem in the summer, but it sure was in the winter. It turned out the frame was completely rusted out. Stewart was driving home on the interstate whem the axle broke and luckily he cruised to a stop. There was no repairing it. I still feel really stupid about this.

Another bad experience was getting formaldehyde foam insulation blown into this old house. It was heavily promoted in the 70s. And there was not a lot of insulation in this house between the plaster and lathe and the outside walls. We spent several thousand dollars to have lots of little holes drilled in the siding covered with plastic caps. A few years later all kinds of reports came out about how that formaldehyde caused all kinds of health problems including cancer, especially in airtight homes, like mobile homes. At least our house was very drafty! In the 1990s during one of our restoration projects, we tore out the walls and replaced the foam with fiberglass insulation.

I also fell for an opportunity to have a “free” meal at a nice restaurant sponsored by a energy efficiency expert back in the 70s during the “energy crisis.” I convinced ever skeptical Stewart, to come with me. We did get our free meal but had to endure a hard sell for some different products. We got away without buying anything, although I was certainly weakening and convincing myself what a good deal it was. Stewart has NOT forgotten this experience!

In the early 1980s we had an electrical fire in the kitchen and we decided to remodel the kitchen. An architect we knew drew up plans for us, and my boss at the time, who was married to an ophthalmologist, recommended a contractor who had done a great job on her house project. Trying to be responsible, we got three competitive bids, but were swayed by the smooth talking guy who had worked on my boss’s house. The project turned into a nightmare. It took forever and the contractor clearly had a money and drinking problem that had not revealed itself to my boss. I wound up running around picking up supplies and materials myself. This contractor selected the least expensive materials, or materials he had left over from other projects. It went on for for months and months through the winter while he was bidding on other jobs. All these years later, we can still get enraged about the quality of the work.

These experiences taught me a whole lot about how susceptible people are to being scammed. Most of us think we’re too smart, too sensible, and really good judges of character to see that something is too good to be true. And yet we can get fooled again and again and again. It’s bad enough when it is a total stranger, but often it gets complicated because the one who cheats you is a friend, neighbor, or family member, and you have to live with the shame of being taken for years and years.

As people get older, and lonelier, it’s easier to get taken by people who are so nice, attentive, and seem to need help. We empathize if they say they have had bad breaks, been treated unfairly… and are more and more likely to help them.

In a very strange way, I am grateful that I have been scammed, so I can be on the lookout and distinguish between honest brokers and flim flam men.